Blue Mondays- Part One

By Steve Stuckey

[This post is part of a series called Rooted. Find the other posts here]

What a Weekend

“Wow! What a weekend,” Bill said. “I was up till 2:00am on Thursday night arranging rides for the conference. I woke early Friday morning with a call that one of our seminar leaders was sick and would not be able to make it. Between trying to find a replacement, complete my own seminar, and pack my car with musical equipment, I was tired before I ever reached the dock for our 5:00pm departure to Campus by the Sea. But once on the boat with all the students, the adrenaline kicked in and I was fine. I had a great conversation with a new student on the ride over. My Friday night presentation went well. Students told me how much they appreciated what I had to say and that encouraged me. The next two days were filled with transforming conversations over meals, great worship times, basketball with fellow staff in the afternoon, and a prayer session lasting late into the night. Though I got only five or six hours of sleep each night, I didn’t feel all that tired. The energy of the group and a lot of strong coffee carried me along. So much kingdom work was getting done in such a short time. But then on the boat ride home Sunday afternoon, I noticed that my head hurt and I was starting to feel a little sad. I had worked on the conference for four weeks. It was a fantastic success with numerous students deciding to follow Jesus. But it was coming to an end.”

Monday Morning

“When I woke Monday morning, my whole body hurt and the sadness from the day before had deepened. I checked the backlog of email and started to feel nauseous. Later in the day I was surfing the internet. I stumbled on an advertisement featuring a young woman in a bikini. I clicked and next thing I knew, I was leering at a pornographic website. I knew the site was not good for me, but once there, I couldn’t turn it off. When I finally did turn it off 40 minutes later, I felt ashamed and dirty. How could I go from the heights of serving God one day to the gutter of sexual depravity the next? I even thought that maybe the good things that happened through me on the weekend were just an illusion.”

Spirituality and Energy

If you listen carefully to Bill’s story, which is a frequent account that I hear from InterVarsity staff, you will notice that it is all about energy. There is the creative energy of preparing for the conference; the encouraging conversation on the boat; the praise of students for his talk; the social stimulation of the group, and the satisfaction of completing an important event. His description of Monday was about his experience of the loss of energy and his subconscious attempt to numb his depression with sexual energy that functioned as visual caffeine.

At the most basic level, our spirituality is the way we deal with our inner energy. The Hebrew word for “spirit” is the word breath. It refers to the animating energy given to us at birth that departs from us at death. It is expressed as physical, social, sexual, intellectual, and creative energy. It uniquely defines us and our life in the world. Biblical spirituality emphasizes that our energy does not come from us, belong to us, nor can we naively manage it on our own. It is meant to be returned to God. My conversation with Bill was focused on helping him notice his use of energy. Becoming aware of our inner energy is the first step in spiritual formation. In part one of this blog post, I want to talk about physical energy. In succeeding months, we will discuss the effects of other categories of energy.

Sleep Deprivation

Over a period of three or four days, Bill got less sleep than he needed. Caffeine and adrenalin helped him mask his fatigue and growing depression. A psychologist friend who works with the homeless told me that a sleep deprived person can temporarily experience the same manic/depressive symptoms and loss of impulse control of a person suffering from bipolar disorder. (Many parents of infants face the same challenge.) The boom/bust cycle that many young staff develop is a dangerous way to live if you are an apostle, prophet or evangelist as it can blind you from awareness of your root system and lead to unwise decisions. Elijah is the patron saint of the boom/bust cycle and we will look more closely at his story next month. In the mean time here are a few questions to help you notice your physical energy.

Questions

1. How does your body let you know when you are overly tired? How much sleep do you need per night? What helps you sleep well?

2. Before a major event, what might you do in terms of sleep, diet, and exercise to build up your physical energy? Can you complete event preparation ahead of time so that you can enter the event relaxed?

3. During the event, what might you do to pace yourself, improve your rest/restoration time, eat healthily, or not overdo physical exertion?

4. Post event, could you plan to get extra sleep for a couple of days, or avoid the email and the internet for the first 24 hours?

[This post is part of a series called Rooted. Find the other posts here]